Day 2 - feeling obligated to ego, even when I've in fact walked through a point and supported myself

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed mysef to walk through a point, and then when being completely aware, stable enough, and breathing well enough and knowing the direction once I have walked through an extent of a a point, I have this little side effect of second guessing myself, as if what I used t accept and allow should still be who I am, even though I am clearly standing within this point and continueing therefor, within this I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create the expectation of my own ego, and thus within this dwell on past points, and not letting go of the point, of everything attached to that point,that I did walk through, that I did stand up in, and simply continueing n the next point within my existence, as fully here with that next point.

 When find myself in the position of self judgement, of second guessing myself for the benifit of doubting myself to buy in t the point rather than being confident within that moment as taking n each breath, each st practically - I stop, I breath, and I see what's here, let go of the past, and breath through the experiences and reactions that require holding off momentarily, and working with what is next n daily participation/current schedule participation, and within this, letting go ofthe point through focusing on what's here as myself, equa to myself, and thus building that foundation of self trust, self commitment, and confident integrity as physical, as life participation.

 Within this i commit myself thus breath through the points of possession, and follow the steps of hysical participatin, of labor, of walking, of lays down, breathing being here,untill I am here, stable as self, and then, continue with each point, point by point, ste by step. Fucking simple.

Day 1 - losing energy to write

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to create the point of procrastination and laziness , frm the perspective that because I'm losing the expectations I have placed within my process to self benifit, that now this must mean that particiular points aren't so important anymore, like, who cares ifi let this point accumulate and continue a reference for myself when it is of value t my environment where I will cause a consequence, because he feeling of expectation, and self fulfillment of gan just simply isn't ere, so that must mean that everything is just fucked because it isn't for 'me'.

I commit myself to write form a redefined point of self, of always bringing it back to self as writing for self, and not because I want to hold n to the old patterns that I tried to convince myself were real, and now because I see they aren't real, merely making e excuse that because that doesn't relate well to writing anymore and is much firer deminished, that I must go back to get the fulfillment of that emotional attachment to writing, and thus I should not write, or I should not breath and discovering the step to stand for a change within the relationship which I've defined as emotion.

Wen I find myself In and as a pattern of protecting an emotional attachment, in this resistance and excuse that I must still endure the emotional pattern to stay stable to continue process, I breath, I so the very compulsion that manifests from this protection, and I directly relate t what to change within that moment, that in fact brings it backs changing directly self, and not holding n to a stability point that I used t manipulate within my process, and t kee benifitng that emotion through manipulating words and statements that would in any way create a euphemism from facing the point.

Day one - my journey to practical living process.

Within this blog, I will be applying self forgiveness and self corrective statements in regards to my relationship with my very process.

 I will be focusing on how I create the fundamental polarity points which I use to impede myself from effective application and consistency within my process, which will support myself to adapting to new dimensions of myself more effectively without throwing off course with emotions, and even if in such cases, not opening up new excuses in relationship to the very pattern that I give myself reason to not continue with self directive application/resistance, and will be reaching the points of self judgement, self victimization, self sabotaging, self loathing, etc. which i find to attach while writing, or breathing, generally relating to process, and breaking down all emotional layers that I accept and have accepted myself to accumulate within my ability to walk process, and therefor leveling out where I am within whatever aspect or extent of myself within this process, and thus giving myself better clarity in relationship to when confused in where and how to effectively take the next step, and thus diminishing limitations that I relate to the current emotional pattern to my self directive application, and generally becoming and building myself as more tolerable and effective to adapting and changing myself with consistent willingness, regardless of the extent or aspect of the dimension within myself that Im facing.

 SfS/SCS soon to follow..